Let's be honest here, dudes. We're completely screwing things up/over/to hell. Look around. Our brains/lives/relationships are a goddamn mess/disaster/train wreck. We spend our money on useless crap. Our goals/dreams/aspirations are gathering dust like that ancient cereal in the back of your pantry/pair of shoes you haven't worn since high school/guitar you swore you'd learn to play. We're lost.
Maybe it's time we tried harder/faced facts/admitted defeat and just accepted our fate?
“2. Meant to Be Fucked by You, Guys”
You guys are about this, right? This is the real deal, the kind of nonsense that gets your blood pumping. No space for pussies here, only those who want it all. We're here talking about getting dirty and feeling every inch of the experience.
- Forget that boring stuff you’ve been doing.
- This where the real fun is.
- Take what you deserve: a wild, unforgettable night.
We're not asking. We’re just offering you the truth.
Guys: Bro Fuck Me Right ASAP
Look, I'm not Faking it. I'm feeling it right now and I need some Action. Don't Waste around with Small talk, just Hit that already. I'm Wet and waiting for you to Show me what you got.
Don't be a chicken, I know you want to.
Dude! Those Assholes {Want to Fuck Me|Have It Out With Me Sexually
I mean, come on! It's like they can't Read a Room. I've been trying to Be Firm, but they just {Keep Coming Back|Don't Care . It's getting {ReallyAnnoying.
- Maybe I Should Call the Police.
- For Real| This is getting Totally Unacceptable.
Let Me Be Clear, I just want to Be Left Alone in Safety! Is that too much to ask?
Bro's crank Fucking Lit
Tonight, we're gonna make it rain. I'm talking about a legendary sesh. We gotta get wasted and live it up. I've got {a playlist on fire|some banging tunes that will have you sweating.
We're gonna rage all night long. So, are you ready to party like there's no tomorrow?
Let's make this a story we tell for years.
Fuck It, I'm Calling the Guys
Sometimes, life/shit/problems just gets too much/out of hand/stupid. You're tired/pissed off/done and the only solution is to hang out with your friends/grab some beers/get wasted. It doesn't matter what you're doing/working on/feeling. Just grab your phone and call up the bros/boys/crew. They'll understand/be there for you/probably judge you no matter what.
- It's a rite of passage/guy thing/solid plan
- A few drinks will clear things up.
- They'll probably tell you to chill out/make fun of your situation/suggest a wild plan.